7 Steps to NOT to get a Girl by New Year’s, Part 1 of 3 (because I’m lazy)

       Everyone needs a break, that means even you, Champ!

In the event you become sick and tired of girls and prefer the occasional break. Let’s review 7 steps to total freedom and escape from girls for this New Year’s. Sometimes, gaming is more important.

1)      Be unkempt. Put a paper bag over your head. Wear the shirts you always wear and judge yourself. You want to be brutually honest with yourself. Are you dressing up properly? Are your shirts pressed and color-coordinated? We have a problem; girls will notice you. If that happens, you increase your likelihood in getting a girl. And we don’t want that. So junk that coolness.

2)      Slouch just a wee bit more. If you are standing properly and gaining stature because of your awesome posture, people notice you. You will exude sexy confidence which is highly attractive to women. This posture is the male equivalent of a “hot girl”. And you know what it is like being a person in demand, you won’t have time for your games! New Year parties are such hassle next time. So slouch that shoulder some more to show that you hate taking up space. Walk around passively, or at least try to be. This will give you bonus points in the area of unattractiveness. Your plan’s working.

3)      Don’t care about her feelings. This is a biggie. Many potential gamers who fail to convert to game-hood were because they emphasize with women. These guys understood what’s it like being them without having a hidden agenda. And the women dig that! Are you one of them too? I feel sad for you. You will be consumed with outings creating lots of emotional connection with so many women because they see you as giving love. And in this culture, whoever gives loves, wins. But you don’t want to win in the game of love, you prefer completing your RPG. So here’s the solution, ditch these skills. Act like a dork, socially awkward person who flirts too much, appears slick, and too “greasy”. Allow me to guarantee you that you can successfully weed girls out of your back at the snap of your finger.

There you have it, first 3 tips on winning the battle against girls so that you have some time with yourself. Gosh, sometimes you just want some quiet time with your Xbox 360. That thing costs a bomb! With these 3 methods, most girls will leave you almost immediately. And there’s even a guarantee, their departure is not temporary, it’s permanent. Further, they will share with their friends how much of a stuffed up punk you are that you no longer get calls from ‘her’ friends. You hated those booty calls anyway.  Are these 3 techniques not enough to ward off the persistent girl? Wait for Part 2 where I will show you ingenious ways to NOT get a girl for New Year's! Please wait for the subsequent parts!